Rick, Conman Extraordinaire- We’re Going to Mexico Part 3

After fifteen minutes, I caught a glimpse of Rick talking to a man in a business suit. He was pointing in our direction and talking excitedly.

This went on for a couple of minutes – and then the man nodded his head and Rick walked back to us.

“Ok, Boys it’s all set. Doris Day says you can come over and say Hello to her, ” he announced.

No one said anything. No one moved.

Mom, clearing her throat said – “Boys, it would be rude to keep Doris Day waiting. Go down and say Hello to her. And don’t forget to act like Gentlemen.”

Matty looked at me like we had to decide who mounted the gallows first. Needless to say, I shared his anxiety.

After all…

We were two adolescent boys in a strange land, who found themselves summoned to meet an American equivalent of Royalty – a Movie Star. And we were supposed to do it solo – with no Adult buffer or help.

So yeah, we were practically soiling ourselves with nervousness.

To make matters worse – although I had heard of Doris Day – I had never watched any of her films on TV.  So, I hadn’t a clue about what to say to her? Somehow “Hello Miss Day, even though I don’t watch Your Movies – it’s so nice to meet you, ” didn’t sound like it would make a good impression.

Well, I’d just try to be my Charming Self and get through this I thought.

With a heavy sigh that only a child could make, I took Matty by the arm and dragged him down the aisle. His body seemed to gain 25 pounds with each step we took. So, by the time we got Miss Day’s booth I was already red and perspiring with exertion. Matty was white and looked like he was ready to faint or bolt.

Facing us was a seated woman flanked by two mean-looking Hombres in business suits. The men glowered at us and I cringed inwardly. The woman stared at us with a hint of a smile.

“Miss Day,” (if it was Her?) was dressed in a cream colored outfit, wearing white gloves and a hat that looked like an inverted bucket that sat like a crown on her head. 

With my left hand behind me and my right arm across my waist, I gave a courtly bow from the waist and said:

“Miss Day – my name is Charles Mallbeck and this is my brother Matty. It is an honor to meet you and…ah…my brother and I uh…love all your movies.”

“Miss Day” gave us a little smile and said, “Thank You.”

Her escorts – the two mean-looking Hispanic men scowled at me.

Not to be outdone and catching my cue Matty also gave a little head bob like Hop Sing from Bonanza and added:

“Howdy-Do Miss Dory…nice to meet you.”

“HOWDY-DO? MISS DORY?!” “Spock, for God’s sake beam me back up,” I thought. I felt like kicking Matty.

But just when it seemed things couldn’t become any more awkward,   Matty continued.

“Is it true that Rock Hudson is gay? My step Father, Rick, says he is….so I was just wondering if you knew or not.”

The frowns of the Hispanic escort deepened further and I thought that’s it, we’re done, they’re going to kill us.

But “Miss Dorry” ignoring Matty’s gross faux pax –  appeared to find our shenanigans amusing and she gave Matty a little smile with a shake of her head.

And then the Adults pointedly ignored us, focusing their attention on the upcoming race.

Matty and I just stood there.

And stood there.

After what seemed to be an eternity of staring at each other – I gave the Adults a bow and taking Matty by the arm I dragged him back to our seats.

“Matty you jerk. Her name is Doris Day… not “Miss Dory”! And what’s with this Rock Hudson gay stuff?”  I hissed at him underneath my breath. “Jesus, I thought those men were gonna kill us when you said that.”

“Well, Rick said he was, so I wanted to know if it was true?” Matty squeaked.

I just rolled my eyes.

Idiot.

End of Part 3

To be continued…

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